Sunday, October 08, 2006

About Gender as to Sex and Identity

It is a month gone by since my last posting. I've been at work retrieving vintage books of the past dozen or more years that I'd like to post and feature on my web site . The underlying motif and most persistent is what I've come to grasp and understand about gender as to sex and identity.

My voyage has been one in which I sought my Who's I had been, sorted through them (known, unknown and others unexpected): Who's I scarce recognized as having to do with me at all. The tools for my doing so -and the ways I employed them addressed my 'cluelessness'. (A sort of selective amnesia.) Such as I have found is part and parcel of what most of us do in a lifetime of living the unexamined life.

Being an artist was to attempt examining my life. Not that it was my main intension. My art was about pornography and sex. And provided me very basic essentials for accomplishing more than I set forth to do. It was a kind of pornography, custom-made, to meet my especial artistic purposes, my curiosity and my prurience. The motifs, as far as I could tell were to indulge in the taboo, the impermissible and the obscene. Yet these very motifs provided me with the sum substance for finding my Who's! I was not looking for them here, was not seeking to find, identify, examine, or obtain the sense of empathy and insights that actually occurred.

My work awakened me to there being a metaphysics I was engaging -this work was a redefining and a denoting, a glossary (as yet to be alphabetized) of the most common and most ordinary stereotypes we share as to notions about sex and gender as to the Who's we are and become in a lifetime.

The work I've engaged in all centered and obsessed on denoting 'Gender', what we mean by being 'male-masculine,' 'female-femanine' what as to gender and our sense of who we are/become when we have sex. What we permit and and we do not, is impermissible and unacceptable. And even as to my right to query, examine and to express this.

I have done so in the drawings and the narratives I've made. And throughout the process grew aware of, saw patterns, redundancies, units of repetition:


.... I did so, positing that my cock (my very own) was my 'divining' rod authenticating what I was endeavoring to achieve.

I imagined it as an infallible arbiter as to what was and was not 'true', 'real', and 'authentic'... also as to singularly the Who's I may be - become, could be - become, choose or reject being - becoming. -Or utterly, totally deny ....etc.!

Ah, yes, there be, Horatio, more genders than I dreamed of!

To be continued.


Blogger nina said...

"Being an artist was to attempt examining my life."

I would suggest to you then - that you are an artist. The soul inside you is what yearned to create, to examine, it wasn't an attempt. It was the voice inside you screaming to be heard. I would love to see your work sometime too. I think it would be as provocative as your words.


October 19, 2006 at 12:34 AM  
Blogger nina said...

I'd also like to hear your thoughts on these too:

this, this, and this.

Thanks so much!


(please feel free to email your thoughts if you would be so kind. lazygeisha [at] gmail [dot] com)

October 19, 2006 at 12:41 AM  

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